25 August, 2010

It's Daddy's Little Girl's Turn

I met this great friend of mine from half the world who brought me back me to church, toured me around his country and taught me Photography (not necessarily in order). One time we decided to write each other how God has been good to us each day for 365 days. Here's one of my entries dated May 16, 2010 (6th entry).

Image not mine.

It's Daddy's Little Girl's Turn

Today is my father's birthday - the real one. It's funny he has two. His birth certificate says December 2 but he didn't change it anymore due to all the hassles he needs to go through if he does. As I always do, to make greetings more special, I waited for 12AM to greet him. I sent him a text message and he replied to me in Spanish "Mucho Gracias mi Unica Hija". I smiled. My father knows am catching up with his Spanish.

I am blessed to have a father like mine - someone who is nothing but a great example to us. He lead us to God's path and introduced us to His ways. Now, no matter where we go or have gone, we will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6) 

I have been a very good daughter except for some eight long years of my life. I made him suffer. There were some Christmases and New Years and special occasions that I don't drop by the house; not because I forgot but because I can't stand looking at his eyes and knowing the kind of life that I am living. Guilt was my greatest weakness.  I isolated myself from my own family and I hurt the most precious man in my life. The man who took me out every morning for jogging, the man who told me stories before bed, the man who taught me how to pray, the man who hugged me when I was trembling due to high fever, the man who danced when I was sad, the man who cries when he scolds me and the man who can't wait to tailor my wedding dress for me.

Every chance he could get, he'd grab me and beg me to give him a chance to pray for me. I would act like a stone and just let him pray then I would cry on my way home. I was helpless; at least that's how I felt. He never gave up. I knew he prayed and prayed and prayed. He didn't shout his anger at me. He knew there's no other way but pray for me. 

One time I went to see visit them after what seemed like forever and I saw how old they have turned - wrinkled face, dark skin, they seemed shorter, and a lot of gray hair (very far from how I remembered they look the last time I saw them) - and I said to myself "What am I doing to them?" Still, I was hard as a stone and thought I can wash away all these guilt feelings by just crying. Now I look back, I wonder why it took me so long. I could have ended his misery earlier.

It is true, the prayer of the righteous man is effective. (James 5:16) It took him years and maybe anyone could have given up. He didn't. Now I met the Lord again and He changed my heart. He removed the guilt in my heart and taught me how to forgive myself. It is a long process to make things right but at least I see clear now.

William Law said "There is nothing that makes us love a man so much as praying for him."  My father has shown his utmost love for his only daughter by not giving up in praying for her. Now it's time for his daughter to show hers.


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